sigh...
another have just past..
but nothing seems to be accomplished other than my guzheng composition..
finally its really done..
hahz..
after all teh different ammendments..
hazh..
=)
hmm...
now the headach part.
gotta store it in the com..
but i dunno how to use the program..
sigh..
maybe mon ask mr wong ba..
=(

hm..
maybe i wun talk to you le..
until i find out the way to prove myself..
cos i seriously got no idea wad can i prove to you abt myself...
other than consoling you and asking you not to be stress, there seem to be nothing i can do for you...=(
well... as much as i know, wadever i'm feeling, you wun wanna care so much...
hahz... why should you ??
i jus a nobody to you..
sigh..

anywya MICK!!! where are you!!!
disappear again...
sigh..
this fri, i'm going RJC...
dunno if you're going not..
but if you are, may see you..
yupyup..
:)
pls hor...
dun appear and disappear from my side as and when you like..
i'm not really please abt it..
=)

just drew another pic today... ahhz...
find it quite nice so draw it..
hahz.. next time i will post wad i draw.. but dun laugh if its ugly...


is it nice??? hope so ba...
hazh... dint take me long to draw...

today is investiture day.,..
cool..
saw alot of different skol pple..
hahz..
the 1st batch of pple we saw coming into the hall was jion's gp..
cat high,..
hazh..
at that point of time... shi hui blushed..
ahzh..
we all know why la huh???
hahz.
yupyup
the performance was just too good to be true..
hazh...
hmm... den when everything's over, we had our recess..
hahz..
hmm... ran another 2 rounds... and took my 100m timing again..
today deprove alot..
its either i ran the curve instead or my starting timing was wrong...
sigh..
hmm... then when recess was abt to end, we chiong back to class.. hahz..
this time, shi hui cant hide...
jion was like walking towards our direction..
and saw us.
hazh..
me and stef said hi..
but lousy shi hui dint. jus walked away..
aiyo..
hazh.. after skol..
saw this person that looks like wei han..
aiyo... so alike..
nearly wanted to call that guy er ge..
but realised that that person cannot be him..
cos the uni is different from jion's..
so dint care le..
but remembered something...
mum says mic and wei han look alike too..
that person cannot be mick right???
i will get a shock man..
haz..
then went to the bus stop..
wanted to take opp macs..
but the bus took so long to come, so i jay- run..
hahz.. then ede played with my fone..
hahz.. meet cat high pple again..
sigh..
so got fate ah???
hazh...

anwyay yay!!! kor, you're coming with me to rjc...
hahz... hope the musical performance is nice..
hahz.. a charity ma... hahz.. =)

tmr is investiture day le..
so sad...
ks is not going... neither is kor going..
but hor..
jion kinda gave me a shocked just now...
cos a last min decision, he's going... wah..
pls hor mummy...
hahz..
anwyay quite cold to me le...
sigh..
nvm, since i'm not close to you guys le...
6 months gone, wad you expect..

sigh...
mum just poured cold water on me lor..
sigh... she knows i like ks, but wadda...
says she doesnt want ks as her son- in - law or something liddat..
cos he's irresposible..
over the past, jap..
sigh..
no matter how hard i tried to explain to her that ks is not irresponsible..
sigh..
anyway no matter wad... he's still my prince-charming la..
nothing can change the fact,unless someone can really replace his position in my heart..
which is impossible...
sigh..
if i can wait for one guy for 7 years b4 going with zc, i can also wait for ks..
no matter how long..
sigh...

anyway past few days haven been in a good mood.
sudden mood swings...
sigh..
lan guan.. thanks alot kor...
you tried to cheer me up..
thanks alot for your effort..
though it dint realy work la...
but still wanna thank you..
wanted to chat with you and er ge de..
but den hor...
now i kinda fear le..
even though still chat with him..
sigh..
feel that we arent as close as before..
and i know i'm avoiding him as much as i can..
probably he will read this entry ba..
but nvm..
always wanna chat with him, but just cant find a reason to, and get myself too..
until after a long while, then i will say "hi" or something lidat..
really hate this man..
wanna be like b4 when i can just call and talk to him..
but forget it..
who am i to do so now..
sigh...

hmm... today.. ran for my 100m during recess to take timing..
so sad..
run so slow..
nvm..
my shoe nearly came off.
at that point when it nearly dropped off, i feared..
cos it was the same track that i got my terrible blister...
think i slowed down alot compared to last year..
how to get into to runs for sports day??
sigh..
hope i dun get into 4x100 too..
sorry guys... we promise to join and be in the same team again??
but i dun think joan's joining too..
hazh..
and i'm supposedly not to run or jump..
but no matter wad... i wanna get into jumps...
and probably javelin ba..
cos i love javelin like mad...
but never get the chance to take part in it
sigh...

anywya today quite sianx..
chiong like hell for chinese test in the morn
sigh...
quite sianx today..
so draw alot of rubbish on my diary..
includes 2 anime..


this is the actual thingy i drawed in my diary...



a closer one ba... hahz...

cant remember from wad anime... hahz...
anyway mum says i improved alot..
but na... still look like sai man..
hazh

today com just got fixed...
and wei han got his blog too!!!..
but so sad...
after a while he install password le...
means... i cannot see le..
sigh...

anyway today sigh alot of times in skol, also dunno why..
shi hui keep asking me why i keep sighing..
but i really got no idea..
i only know i'm totally obsessed with someone..
but den, no matter wad i do, i just cant touch that person..
no fate..
and the person i hate most is faning me almost every single day..
jiamin, not referring to you though we sms everyday...
referring to a guy...
hahz..
i just want peace..
a normal relationship...
qualities just like him....
but not many is like him le ba..
sigh...

to that person:
you knew that i dreamt of you le..
and i really did..
twice in a row..
wad does it imply..
dreams dun come true for me only after a few years later..
sigh...
wad i dreamt of you are just really fantastic things that i never dreamt before..
but we all know they are just dreams..
if it is possible, i wanna stay in my dream forever...
so that you will be in it too...
sigh...

today received a jigsaw puzzle of the jie mei men photo...
hahz...
jiamin... my darling.. thanks alot...
i'm very touched...
=)
there was a letter too... hahz...
eh... mei ah...
you write hor, [that sentence]
i blush lor..
hahz..
me only crazy with my crush... no more ex le...
hahz..
hmm...
hahz
anyway after skol, went back together with mei mei men...
took bus then mrt... =)but so sad..
the time is so short...
waiting to go back together again...
=)

anyway... sec ones ah..
sometimes hor...
can drive me up my grave...
hahz..
only 2 months. form so many cliques le..
haiyo...
so many problems between you and classmates..
sigh...
da jie must solve for you all de...
who ask me, so teng ai you all...
haiz...
hahz

think got one week never blog le ba...
hahz... sorry... ever since chinese new year.. my com just wouldnt work le..
so i'm using my cousin's com now..
sigh...
so many tests these few days...
more to come..
even if my com is working, guess wun have the time to use too..
hahz.. anyway hmmm... sun[13/02/05] haD dance from 1.30 to at night 8..
hahz...
so as usual morning went to chc for service..
took alot of photos...
with zc and tze wei..
but used sista yvonne's cam..
think she wun mind ba..
but it was the last time i went..
cos my mum totally ban me from going there..
sigh
okok... had dance till so late cos tue is my performance..
haz...

hmmm mon, [14/02/05]
valentine's day..
hahz... practically everyone was smsing me the whole day..
hahz... wished alot of pple too...
hahz.,.. think my phone gonna explode le..
hahz...
was hoping for a miracle to happen.. but it dint..
sigh... anyway brought the cam that i borrowed from ben...
then took alot of photos with mei mei men...
took with classmates too...
hahz...
afterskol..
chionged to kcpss..
meet belle and weiqi..
so nice... when i reach, belle's game start..
this time she won..
then weiqi gave me a present for v'day..
hahz..
so sweet... feeling guilty..
cos i dint get her anything..
gave belle a ring ba,..
hahz...

okok.. tue[15/02/05]
total defense day...
1st house meeting..
went for selection..
but i dint go....
my performance...
dance la..
hahz..
okok... at suntec... so cold ah there...
nearly freeze..
okok... then the stage is so horrible.. hardly can dance..
hahz..
then got scolded terribly...
hahz... performance at night... practiced from afternoon to night..
put make up too... hahz... tchr helped us..
but next performance onwards, gotta put our own le..
sianx..
hahz..
okok..
the end.. a success... hahz..
we had a gp photo too...
hahz..
but too bad i dun have..
sigh..
shall ask ye lao shi to send..
hahz
=)
hmmm.... 1st time talking to the guys in 3 years
hahz
know them so long, but never talked to them.. neither did they talk to us until today..

wed[16/02/05]
hhaz.... had skol as usual... but today mep damn slack...
hahz.... hahz...
got back mock paper... then after that no lessons... just listen to songs then go home le...
cool... hahz...
loved this day most...
but at home dint get to rest...
chiong for chinese... and some maths...
chinese still ok lei...
but this time the maths i dunno a single thing..
sigh... learnt my lesson.. next time must pay attention in class...
hahz...

okok... thur got nothing other than knowing that ernie's stopping a maths class...
cos he's too busy..
sigh....
my best buddy is leaving,.. soon the class will be quiet..
hahz.,..
took photo with him too..
hahz..

sat...[19/02/05]
the real today... hahz... so free... no skol... only got guzheng..
so here i am at ben's house... hahz... uploaded the photos... into my thumbdrive..hahz..
thanks ben.. hahz.,.. anyway fell slack too.. hahz...
well... so sad... wanted to ask wh to go out...
but he couldnt make it..
he got skol in the morning..
then afternoon he gotta go church..
hahz..
he said he was tricked into going..
wah...
wh, who tricked you de...
tell me... must ask that person to teach me... then can trick you into going church with me... ahhz...
sigh... see la... you say if i wanna see can ask you out... when you're free, i gotta go back skol for dance..
when i'm free, no dance, you cant make it...
sigh... like wad you said, no fate..
hahz...used to have so much fate...
can see you every sat..
but now cannot..
sigh....
anyway still sad you cant come for my skol's investiture lei...
if njot can see you le.. hahz... wun have to wait so long too.. hahaz... =)
anyway hope you will enjoy in the church ba... then next time when i ask you to go, you wun reject it.. hahz...
which i supposed wun be so easy de...
hahz..
anyway i have yet to see your brace... hazh... must show me k??
aishiteru...

anwyay jia min... thanks for all the presents you gave me...
you're so sweet...
=)
one of my best mei.... hahz...
hahz... all the secrets we share with each otehr, cannot leak hor??/
hahz... anyway i saw the tag... but...
my com's not ok yet...
used my kor kor's com...
hahz...
at his house now... hahz... take care hor???
hahz...

typed so many... hope you're not asleep le ba??/
hahz....
anw, until now i still love "him"
yet... no more chance..
i also miss another"him"
but no point.. hahz..
think they both have the person they like...
one have a gf le..
the other though still single, but he like someone else...
hahz....

pearly misses ks and she really does..

thats my msn nick ba?
hmmm... well in a sense miss someone alot ba..
but i can never express my feelings to that person anymore
its kinda over ...
no love can be blossomed between us anymore...

i'm just a sadistic person ba...
v day's coming...
i only got a wish..
ks, go there and find her ba..
even if cannot, still try..
until you can..
probably by then i can really get you off my mind ba

new year..
a meaningless year for me this year..
dun even wanna celebrate it..
but got no choice..
its like tmr.
sigh..
i'm really in no mood for all these.
sigh..
only thinking of something..
why kor and jie all same as me..
sigh...
like wad kor write.. Li+O2+V+Y+E+U
extracted from derrick kor
but i shall add somemore..
U2+hI+Sin+ma+Kr => Li+O2+V+Y+E+U
ahhz...chemical equation..
try solving it..
hahz..
ben dun say it k???
hahz...

as promised.. i will take the dedicated prayer down...
gigh..
lots of things happened the past few days..
results dropped like hell..
failed bio ,lit and a maths common test 1..
chem just passed by a bit..
wads more.. lost the ring belle gave me..
cried almost immediately after knowing i lost it..
the ache in me losing is like so much more than losing my precious bracelet or anything..
somemore went to meet belle on that day..
had a heavy heart when i went kcpss
but no choice..
promised her i'll go..
thankfully she wasnt disappointed with me..
hahz..
saw her..
her friend xinyi also saw me..
whoa..
mei da mei siao..
call me fishy..
sigh..
why??
i look like fish meh??
hahz..
nvm.. if i'm fishy, den belle is my piggy..
hahz..
poor belle... blame xinyi ah..
hahz..
anyway.. belle alr my aunty belle.. hahz

anyway had dance on sun from morning to evening..
then chiong for piano...
after dat had to take a cab down to aunty's house..
but i got no money!!!
in the end, uncle paid for me...
den all pang seh me..
ahz.

nvm..
today..
my best day..
got back maths paper..
first in class..
but never reach my expectation.
then ... stef found my ring..
hahz.
stef thanks alot..
belle... me found de ring le..
hahz..
so no need to give me for vday present..
=)
i'lll still see you on vday..
hahz..
but must show me your best k???
i wan and hope you play like last time.. in sngs..
miss the good old time...
hahz..
anyway thanks qi mei..
hahz..
and all those who wrote to me..
=)
will reply you guys asap.. =)

anwyay happy new year eve!!!

today i had a nice day..
esp during bio lesson...
hahz..
dissected a heart...
hahz..
so cool..
was examine the real bicuspid and tricuspid valves..
the semi lunar valve..
hahz
then saw the aortic vein.. the coronary artery...
ahzh..
connective tissue..
so many many..
so fruitful.. somehow i can remember the heart now..
but then drawing siu yat's cardiac arrest heart..
hazh.. oops... ahhz
anwyay i just wanna say..
i love the pig's heart.. cos i dissected it..
fun fun fun..
hahz
but so sad no photos of it.. hahz
hmm...welll..
simin and shi hui... hum ji...
scared of the dead heart..
aiyo.. cannot be liddat lei..
O level how??? if need to dissect ??
hahz..
if dissect a live animal i think you'll faint le ah...

today went j8 to "study"
but went with all my mei mei men to take neos.. then "meet" jie..
yup... hahz... so may pple suddenly sms..
btw... zc...
hahz.. you end late.. cant wait for long..
if not can advice you on your cosmatics...
hahz..
good luck for performance..
hahz..
keep in touch..
hmm...
anyway we took quite a number of neos..
hazh

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